We always have a choice

It is 3:30 am, and I am blogging because I sure can't go back to sleep. Spiritual warfare? Vanilla coffee from the machine this afternoon? A combination of the two? I don't really know. But I drafted this blog in my head earlier, and now I am putting it to paper (metaphorically speaking.)

"We always have a choice." That phrase has been rolling around in my head the last week or so. Like a lot of fundamental truths, it seems like an easy concept but actually has the potential to change lives if we truly embrace it.

And I get it, I'm 25, young and optimistic maybe. But I've seen enough to know know a lie from Satan when I see one.The hopelessness that I hear in peoples' voices when they talk about their lack of options seems to be a common denominator. That sentiment of  "I have no choice." Satan keeps using the same lie because we keep believing it. That's what he does- there's a reason he's called the father of lies.
To cite a few examples:
The kids I talked to who told me they just can't stop being violent. Lie- they aren't lying-they actually believe the lie that Satan is telling them
The girls who told  me cutting themselves was the only way to feel better Lie-"
The old people at the nursing home who are mean and cranky because life has no hope anymore Lie-"

The circumstances in all three of those examples were such that many people would lose hope. The kids and the girls often had been abused in some form or another; and I think we all can understand the hopelessness of life in a nursing home.

But the simple, profound, liberating, beautiful truth is that God always lets us choose how we will respond to our circumstances. I am not saying the alternatives won't be  messy, or scary,or just plain hard; but I have gotten the closest I have ever been to God through the hard, messy, scary times.
I mean if we want to talk lack of options and hope, check out these folks Corrie Ten Boom, Joni Eareckson Tada, or Horatio Spafford- these guys stopped falling for the lie of hopelessness, even in the face of seemingly hopeless lives.
And this goes for every hardship out there: bad day, alcoholism, porn addiction, really bad day, sickness, money troubles, etc.- We can't always control our circumstances, but we always control our reactions.
 We always have a choice.
We always have a choice.

I am a Christian, people should like to be around me.

So, here in France a lot  of the people I come in contact throughout my days are not in a relationship with Jesus. It has been a change from OK/AR/TX culture that I have grown up in, stretching, but only confirming my faith and trust in God.

Its crazy how people are different but really the same at the heart of it all. People are hurting, lonely, and scared. Depressing, but true- it has been this way since the Fall. I don't know how people without Jesus make it sometimes, life can be so hard. And when I hear my friends who don't trust in God say things like " yoga says everything will pass" or " I just have to be strong" I want to cry, I really do. I don't know how that could possibly ease the pain or satisfy their obvious search for deeper meaning; I don't think it does.

Which brings me to the point of this post: as a Christian, I have the source of  love, joy, and peace as my Savior and friend. I should act like it. Seems simple, but I don't think we really get it right all the time. Right now at French school, there are lots of people here from around the world, many not believers. There is a great temptation for me not to invest my time or energy into getting to know them or developing relationships- I know we won't know each other long, and will probably never see each other again. Plus, I am here to learn French, not hang out with other people who make the same mistakes in French that I make.

But, then I remember a magnet my friend has on his fridge in Inola, OK, it says "Bloom Where You Are Planted" and it has a smiling flower on it. I am learning French so I can go tell people about Jesus in Africa, so I am too busy to tell people about Jesus here? Something isn't right with that picture.

So, I try to show that unselfish, irresistible love that Jesus showed me to those around me. I find out what their passions are, their hopes, their fears, and troubles- and we talk about them. If I am brave I pray with them. If the Spirit leads I talk about my experiences with Jesus. It isn't rocket science; its much more important.

On Learning French

Oh man…if I had a quarter for every idea for a blog that I have, I would have like four dollars….speaking of dollars, they are currently stronger than euros!
No but really, whenever I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep, I craft a masterpiece of post, and then in the morning it is gone. I try to blog about things that I don’t talk about in my newsletters so you don’t have to hear the same stuff twice, so my blogs tend to be more philosophical in content, I am discovering.
 But not this one…I thought I would just share some random pieces of information with you re: Learning French.
Lets start with a conversation I had with a patient Leclerc (think smaller Walmart) worker when trying to find the print-picture machine.
Me: Hi, is there a machine where I can borrow my pictures here?
Worker: you mean print your photos?
Me: Borrow.
Worker: Print?
Me: Borrow?
Worker: Print.
Me: yeah, maybe print….
Worker- yes, right over here.
Just so you know- emprunter-borrow: emprimer- print

Smiling and nodding when I don’t completely understand is both useful and dangerous when conversing in French. I just have to make sure the topic of conversation isn’t crucial, and its ok that I only understand the gist of the sentences.
Another thing, lately in conversation I find myself saying “wow yes” a lot, except in French that’s “wow oui” which is “woweee” to my English ears…..and then I feel lame, lol.
My church here has provided me with lots of language learning practice, between sermons and conversations and home group. The home group leader thought I was holding back a bunch of deep thoughts during our conversation- I told him no, in fact I am just trying to stay above water and keep track of the flow of conversation! And if I did have any thoughts, I am not capable of expressing them sufficiently yet. So I am a fairly quiet attendee right now:)
 Overall, it is going well, thanks for reading and praying!

I don't like Valentwhining

Happy Almost-Valentines Day!
How do you feel about this holiday?
I am on board, myself.

I get the argument that it is too commercialized, we should show love all year round, sure. But that goes for pretty much every holiday that extols goodness- Christmas, Thanksgiving, Mothers Day, etc.

And then every V-day I read facebook statuses of single friends and Singles' Awareness Day/being tired of being alone/stuff like that.But I happen to think this idea that 'singleness must equal loneliness' is a lie straight from the pit of Hollywood. But what do I know, I only have 25 years of experience (granted, the first 12 or so years it was kind of a non-issue).

But I digress, if you are really so lonely, go to your local nursing home, sit down with someone (they  most likely won't care that they don't know you) and have a conversation. I bet several things would happen:  1. You won't spend V-day alone 2. You will share some Jesus love 3. Chances are, you'll see what real loneliness is.
The above paragraph sounds harsh, that is why I have never actually said to a Valentwhiner before.

 I love Love. As a follower of Jesus everything I am commanded to do has to do with Love (Matthew 22:37-40) Why would I not love a day based on love?

 Don't hear me saying I think all believers should buy pink bears and musical cards. I think the problem is the fact that this day tends to be centered on romantic love- but you don't have to follow the sheeple that are the American consumers.  You can celebrate V-day with other people who-eternally speaking- are just as significant as any significant other.

I was going to talk about the origins of Valentines Day, about the cool stories about Saint Valentine. But as I read more, there seems to be a lot of different stories, so you can look it up if you would like. He or they sound like great men of the faith. Which we don't really hear much about now amidst everything else.

Tomorrow night, I am going to introduce a couple of my Chinese friends to Mexican food- greater love hath no man than- oh wait no, that's not right:)

I wish you all a Happy Valentines Day!

New Year Post!

I think New Years is to bloggers as Christmas and Easter are to nominal church-goers. If you are gonna post, it should be on New Years! You review your last year, give goals or resolutions for the new year, it generally makes for a good read. Well, today is January 2, so the year is still new:)

About this time last year I was in Dallas, TX. This was when I decided to work as a Scripture Impact worker, I had been in Dallas for about five months doing the beginning linguistic classes and not loving it. It was such a release and relief to change my track and get into training I really enjoyed!

March is when I officially decided to serve the Konyanka people with Brittany and the Brolliers. I had been praying for a people group and a team since July 2010 when I began with PBT. This was such a huge answer to prayer- to work with an unreached people group with a team of people to support me and support!

In July I finished my last PBT training class and came home to raise support. This part of the journey I was a little anxious about, but God provided, so many of my church family has been generous and supportive and are on fire about God's Kingdom spreading to the Bible-less!

Then in October I moved to Chambery, France and began to learn French in preparation for Guinea, where that is the official language. My time here has been very blessed with new friends and team-building with the Brolliers, though they leave this month.

As far as goals or resolutions for  2012, I just read this blog about making four resolutions: spiritual, intellectual, physical, and social. This sounds like a good idea to me, I'll give it a try!
    1. Spiritual- I want to really work on scripture memorization this year, I should probably name a quantity to keep me accountable....lets say a passage (vague on purpose) a week.
    2. Intellectual- this one is easier, I just discovered i-tunes free weekly podcasts, they have ones on economics, science, history, all kinds of things I will never sit down and read about but can listen to a podcast about!
   3. Physical- one word: jogging. No diet resolutions this year, come on people I live with Brittany Bedford!
   4. Social- I will not hole up in my room and hide from French-speaking people, I will talk to them and make mistakes but build relationships through it!

  ok folks, hold me to it:) Happy New Year, love you!

The Conversational Triumvirate

 I have been trying to make conversation with French people here in France. Namely with my roommates who are pictured above. Actually only the two girls on each end of the line are French the other three of us are American. But they have their friends over and we get to hang out a lot together. And I have so far found three topics that can be revisited as often as needed when the conversation reaches a lull: food, movies, and idioms.  Now, maybe this is subject to change with age bracket, I don't know. But discussing these three things has provided me with lots of quality time with new French friends.

Food is kind of a given, while we are sitting around in the kitchen we exchange favorite foods. We wrinkle our noses at each others' discriptions of different dishes, or nod appriciatively- depending on the ingredients. They list foods we have to try while we are here, foods special to the region.

My roommate and I have had several conversations about movies; she tells me most French people think American movies are too happy and naive. I have watched some French movies now, and I told her I find them depressing and without conclusive endings. She said the French like to have to think about the film, and it should be realistic. So, that has been fun, we compare opinions at different movies, and usually our opinions line up with the above generalizations.

Idioms are so much fun. At Thanksgiving we shared some with each other. I never realized how much I use until I speak with someone whose first language is not English.

So, now you know my "backup plan" when having a cross-cultural conversation. Though I think most of the time  only two of these three will apply in Africa:)

Why Re-invent the Wheel?

I had been thinking about doing a post here when I read my friend Erin Duplechin's blog a couple of days ago. And I loved it! It was pretty much what I wanted to say, only I think she did better! So why reinvent the wheel? I just shamelessly asked if I could repost her thoughts on my blog.

 Erin and Kevin and their two girls are also in Pioneer Bible Translators. I got to get to know them a little as we lived in the DFW area at the same time taking classes. They are wonderful!

And so, without further ado... He's Wild, You Know by Erin Duplechin

“He’s wild, you know. Not like a tame lion.”
What is safe?
      I often wonder this. I think of our jungle-bound family and I wonder- is it safe? I certainly get asked that enough. Believe me when I say that I know there are hard times ahead for our family. But aren’t there for everyone?
    I know the risks are real. Diseases. Wild animals. Lack of convenience. Missionaries are not immune from bad things happening. Children get sick. Some lose their lives.
Jim Elliot died at the end of a spear. Yet, his family returned, believing that even at the loss of father, husband, it was worth it. The Kingdom was worth it. Jesus was worth it. Perhaps they clung to his words, “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain that which he cannot lose.”
      I think of the Man of Sorrows, who, for the JOY set before him, endured the cross. Jesus wasn’t safe. He didn’t lead a timid life. He was born to die. But he didn’t run from his destiny. I would be lying if I didn’t admit to the fear within me that sees the calculable risk. Sometimes I want to keep my daughters wrapped up tight, safe in a bubble, fending off harm. But I know this is no way to live. I think they would resent us if, in 15 years, they learned of their parents who weren’t willing to give it all for Jesus; that weren’t willing to say “yes” because it was just too easy to say “no;” that clung to all the stuff they can’t take with them into eternity. How sad it would be for me to look them in the eyes and admit that I’d been too afraid to follow Jesus.
     That brings me back around to the opening question: what is safe? Is safety found in a two-car-garage, white picket fence, 1 cat, 1 dog, SUV filled life (and trust me when I say I long for these things sometimes)? Or is it found in the center of his will? His good, pleasing, so-not-a-bummer will. His will might be picket fences, and that’s certainly okay, but it may also be spotty solar power in the middle of the jungle.
But the reality is that nowhere is safe. People, babies, die right here in my town, every day. But God is good.
We walk with a God who isn’t known for safety. He’s a Man of War, the roaring Lion of Judah.
“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver. “Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.” –C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
~Erin

If you want to check out the Duplechin's  blog it can be found at http://untilallhear.wordpress.com/